Thursday, January 31, 2008


I don't think there is a celebrity I feel more sorry for than Britney Spears. I know the media hype is partially of her own creation, but I also feel that her situation is being mismanaged by her handlers. Lots of celebrities slip into rehab with no one knowing until after they've been admitted. This girl needs a motorcade just to get to the hospital.

While substance abuse may also be at play here, it seems pretty obvious at this point that there is also a mental health problem and for that reason, I think this separates her from most celebrities. Lots of famous folks have some self-induced downfall, but with Britney, I feel like maybe there are other forces at play here, things she can't control without therapy and/or medication.

It's just sad in her situation, that so many people are profiting from her breakdown.


Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Say Hello to My Little Friend

After two years with a crappy vacuum that kept on breaking, I finally went all out and got one of these.

Labels: ,


Don't get all excited, it's not Friday. Yet. But Friday is a glorious and wonderful day for so many reasons and not the least of which is that on Friday Rolo will be six months old. Which means I get to stop breastfeeding. The fact that I will be able to slowly wean myself off that torture device they call a breast pump is thankfully distracting me from the fact that my kid has been around for half a year. On one hand I'm thrilled that I can stop pumping and on the other hand, I'm even more thrilled when I really think about how this will impact my life. It's become so engrained in my life that when I really consider that within a few weeks, I won't have to lug an extra tote bag around with me everywhere, nor will I have to build every day around where and when I can have some privacy, it's completely mind-blowing. Freedom, precious freedom!

I was reading a nursing site the other day where someone was talking about pumping exclusively and how some women did it because they were just too wound up to "relax" and allow their kids to nurse all day. Which infuriated me. I'm posted here before that one of the reasons I pump (other than the fact that I chose to work) is that Rolo would nurse, literally, all day long if I let him. He was totally inefficient at it and because he would fall asleep just minutes after starting to eat, getting full meals into him was like an all day project. And this blogger was basically marveling that someone, like me, wasn't patient enough to do just that.

Let me ask you this: how boring does your life have to be that you think spending days on end getting your kid to eat is totally cool and fun?

For whatever reason, Rolo always would drink a bottle straight down (with burping breaks of course) but would always fall asleep before he was finished eating if he was actually nursing. Beats me as to why, you'd have to ask him. But I don't think women who breastfeed, but choose to pump, should be criticized for not being patient with their kids. Believe me, in the middle of the night, it would be great to just attach a baby to you instead of a machine.

Another person mentioned how "lucky" women who pump are because they get to continue their regular lives and go out without the baby, etc. Yeah, um, I don't know that lucky is the word I would use. Mostly, because pumping is a choice and if you think we're so lucky, you're free to start pumping any time you'd like. But pumping is also incredibly draining, because you're literally measuring everything in ounces, constantly worried about production in a way that those who nurse don't. I'm not suggesting that nursing doesn't come with it's own level of anxiety about production--it's just not as tangible, being measured in bottles.

And don't even get me started on nipple confusion. Every baby is different, but mine didn't care if it was a bottle, a breast or a freaking shotglass as long as it had food in it. Perhaps there are more finicky babies who get confused but it certainly wasn't the case for Rolo.

So anyway, that within the next few weeks Rolo will be on formula entirely is a good thing. Liberating somewhat. Which means that Operation: Take My Body Back must go into fully swing. My brother's getting married this summer and I've got to look smashing. Plus, you, my dear readers, won't have to read about my boobs anymore. A win-win, no?

Labels: ,

Monday, January 28, 2008


Last night, Ron and I went to dinner with our friends Deidre and Frank as part of Restaurant Week. We had decided on FARMiCia, as they had a pretty extensive menu relative to most other Restaurant Week participants.

All in all, we had a pretty good experience. The wait for the food seemed unreasonably long, given that the restaurant wasn't that full, but other than that everything was enjoyable. Deidre and I started with p.i.n.k. cocktails (which are disappointingly not pink) and the boys tried out a couple of beers. A choice of white, sourdough or rosemary bread was offered with herb-flavored butter. I chose the rosemary and thought it was delicious (as it should be; FARMiCia is owned by the same folks as Metropolitan Bakery).

Slowly, I've been dipping into the seafood world by trying out dishes involving crab. So I chose the crabmeat and pear salad, which was delicious, albeit, crabby. I only ate about half the crabmeat, but it was a generous portion. There was a lime dressing that added nice kick and almonds gave a nice texture. I also tried Ron's crab cake and honestly, I really liked it. Should have ordered that, maybe.

As my entree I decided on the ribeye steak, with chive mashed potatoes. I had been torn between the steak and dijon mustard pork chops (with mashed sweet potatoes--yum!). The steak was very flavorful and came with a blue-cheese butter. I'm not a super huge fan of blue cheese, but I found that it works really well with steak and this was no exception. Ron had the St. Peter's fish (tilapia), Frank had the tuna and Deidre had the swordfish. Everyone seemed to like their entrees. I tried the polenta (which I've never had before) that came as a side with the swordfish. It's sort of pleasingly bland.

Finally, for dessert, I had the vanilla bean creme brulee, as did Ron. Ron didn't care much for it. I liked it well enough, but the shortbread cookie that came with it was disappointing. It kind of tasted like a Shoprite sugar cookie that I used to get as a kid. Deidre had the apple puff pastry, which she loved. Frank got the apple and pear crisp and I don't think I asked how he like it--me bad.

After dinner we dropped into Jager's, a dive bar down the street from FARMiCia. They have an impressive wall of beer on tap and an even more impressive shot menu (who knew there was even such a thing as a shot menu?). Not surprisingly since it was a school night, we opted not to do any shots. By the way, being smoke-free makes dive bars a lot more enticing. I enjoy me a dive bar anyway. And unscheduled stops for after-dinner drinks with good friends is one of my most favorite ways to pass the time.

Labels: ,

On Becoming a Hippie

I think I'm becoming a hippie. Well, not really. But perhaps I'm more hippie-ish than before. I thought it started with all the toy recalls, but really, I guess it started before I had Rolo, when I decided to breastfeed. But the toy recalls got me reading about lead and BPA and all sorts of other crazy things. Now I'm buying Rolo all organic baby food and looking into making my own baby food. I'm looking into non-plastic sippy cups (I really should look into non-plastic or otherwise BPA-free bottles too, but I don't want to go overboard here). And I'm seriously considering cleaning the house with distilled white vinegar instead of my beloved assortment of Lysol products. And all my anti-bacterial hand and dish soaps? They'll be replaced with the regular pro-bacteria kind when they run out.

In the spring, I plan on starting to buy all my produce from the Headhouse Square Farmer's Market. I've started buying organic produce in the regular grocery store for now.

Maybe all this isn't so surprising. In high school, I was sort of a hippie. I was all artistic and was part of an environmental group, in which we worked on preserving the ocean from contamination. Plus, I wore china flats in high school with smiley faces and peace signs painted on them and if that doesn't scream hippie, I don't know what does.

I can't say that my household will ever be totally green. In fact, just yesterday I tossed glass bottles in the regular trash. But I am trying to reduce our exposure to toxins. Impossible to do entirely, but something is better than nothing.

I promise I'll get on that recycling thing too.

Labels: , , ,

Friday, January 25, 2008

Blind for Real

So I had wound up going to the Wills Eye Emergency Room earlier this week. The light sensitivity was pretty had and my vision had started getting blurry. The doctors there confirmed that the pink eye was still raging and that it was causing abrasions on my eyes--hence, the blurry vision. I was given a round of steriods and ointment and sent on my way with strict instructions to return for a follow-up appointment today. Because apparently if you put steriods on your eyes and don't follow up with a doctor, your eyeballs just fall out.

So today, my eyes look better, the light sensitivity is almost gone, and my vision is better, although not perfect. The opthomologist today told me that I need to continue the steriods, that I would need another appointment in two weeks, so they could follow-up again and fit me for glasses.

Back the truck up.


Yeah, I'm not ready for glasses.


Wednesday, January 23, 2008


Holy shit.

When I got out of the shower this morning, I overheard a reporter on the downstairs TV saying things like "untimely death", "autopsy scheduled today", "rising star" and "unfulfilled promise". And heaven forgive me, but my first thought was "Oh my God, Britney finally offed herself."

But no, they were talking about Heath. Who reminds me of Johnny Depp. When he would clean himself up, he was so beautiful, it almost hurt to look at him.


Tuesday, January 22, 2008

That Dorky Guy from Roseanne

You know, I don't really watch many TV shows that aren't found on the Food Network or HGTV...or VH1. But I really love The Big Bang Theory. You should watch it too.


He Had A Dream All Right

This morning reporters were jokingly talking about this. And then at the coffee shop this morning two women were also talking about it, giggling like schoolgirls with crushes, saying how bad they felt for him.

My question is, how popular do you have to be that falling asleep at a MLK tribute is considered to be cute? Because if that were anyone else, the media would be eating him alive and there would be people calling for him to be exiled from the country.


Monday, January 21, 2008

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night

More eye-bitching. My conjuntivis, aka "pink eye" started to clear up the end of last week, when a new eye problem emerged. My left eye, the one which had the pink eye worse, felt like a tiny knife was stabbing it in the back somewhere. Know how it feels when you've got something in your eye and it starts to tear? And then it starts to close involuntarily because it's trying to flush whatever it is out? Yeah, it was kind of like that. Except for days. Now, pink eye does make it feel like you've got sand or dirt or something in your eyes, but it's annoying, not exactly painful. This was painful. I couldn't keep my eye open and if I did, it also caused my vision to start going wonky.

I'm not an emergency room type of person. I've never gone to one personally (well, other than to "check in" when I was in labor) and I could really only envision going if I were bleeding. A lot. That being said, on Saturday, I was seriously considering going to the Wills Eye Emergency Room. My eye really hurt, I was having extreme light sensitivity (as in wearing sunglasses inside), and my vision was all over the place. I was walking into things and my depth perception was totally off. I made the decision that if things were still that bad on Monday, it was off to Wills Eye, I go.

Yesterday, things improved somewhat. Today, my eye feels a lot better, but still light sensitivity and my vision is still blurred. In fact, staring at a computer this long is not helping so I'm going to sign off. Two weeks until my ophthomology appointment!


Thursday, January 17, 2008


Yeah, so we've had a bit of a hard time about it recently here in DJ Heavy land. I half expect a pack of locust to show up on my doorstep. To boot, Rolo has decided that sleeping through the night is no longer his thing. I've tried talking to him about it, but he's completely unreasonable.

However, a bit of a bright spot: tomorrow I'm going to try on the cast for my new wedding band. Nothing like a little bling to make a girl feel better


Wednesday, January 16, 2008


See, this is what happens when a bunch of angry brides start organizing.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Annoying Me

So I've been having problems for the better part of two years with the photography studio that shot my wedding. I've received hard-copy proofs, but never received digital proofs (as stated in my contract), parent albums and enlargements (both of which I ordered last spring, and I've been unable to design or order my actual album.

This past fall, the company stopped returning calls and emails entirely. I filed complaints with the Better Business Bureau and Ron and I were considering a civil suit, when we started getting strange mass emails from the company that they were moving to an internet only based company. As in shutting their offices down. Which seemed....shady.

Then a got a call from a friend, who had read online how the company is going bankrupt. I don't know if this is true, but there are message boards of frenzied brides threatening a class action lawsuit against the company. Which, by the way, is Celebration Studios, and you can find their website here. It's a new redesign of their old website, but in this version they removed all names of contacts, and only have one phone number (the company serves Philadelphia, NJ and NY and used to have offices and phone numbers in all those locations). Also, their mailing address is now just a P.O. Box.

Sigh. I'm pretty certain that sound I'm hearing is a few thousand of my dollars going down the drain.

Labels: ,

Monday, January 14, 2008

Tired and Going Blind

For the second night in a row, little Rolo has been waking up every couple of hours at night screaming his head off. He seems to be in some discomfort, but I can't tell why. Could be teething, although I don't feel any teeth. I'm also suspicious that carrots don't agree with him, as we recently introduced those to his diet. So tonight, we're banning the carrots, go back to sweet potatoes and we'll see what happens.

Getting up with Rolo is a more time-consuming process now, since I'm half-blind. My left eye looks like it's actually bleeding (lovely) and my eye socket is swollen to twice the size. My right eye is just red and looks like I've been drinking too much. When I had pink eye in just one eye, I was self-conscious, but at least you could tell there was something wrong with my eye. Now that it's in both, it looks like I've been crying and also, that Ron punched me in the face. Which could be why I'm crying, come to think of it. Anyway, now I'm really self-conscious about going out in public. More annoying is that in the middle of the night, it takes me about 5 minutes of trying to separate my eyelashes and putting a warm compress on my eye before I can go get the screaming baby.

I've been to Health Services at work, where I was told to only use compresses and artifical tears. And I've spoken with my doctor who prescribed eye drops, but concurred that if the conjunctivitis is viral, the drops won't do any good (so far they haven't). All I know is that it's been 8 days and I'm really fed up.

Labels: ,

Sunday, January 13, 2008

The Compromise

Before Rolo was born, I had decided on this bedding if we had a boy. The one sticking point for Ron and I was whether to use a bumper. I was all for one, Ron was against it. True, there is some concern regarding suffocation when using a bumper, but I felt that if we used a flat bumper, as opposed to one of the super-poofy, pillowy ones, we'd be okay. Lest Ron seem alarmist, the pediatrican who saw Rolo in the hospital was all like "NO CRIB BUMPER!" without us even asking.

Even though it seemed like an over-abundance of caution to me, I wasn't willing to override Ron's thinking that we shouldn't use a crib bumper. God forbid something should happen, and then I'd feel like it was my fault. But Rolo had also started sticking his arms and legs out between the slots of his crib and would wind up screaming. What's a person to do?

The solution we decided on was the breathable bumper by Breathable Baby. It doesn't exactly match his bedding, but it's a good compromise. It's a thick mesh, so if Rolo winds up pulling it over his face or something, he can breathe right through it. It's secured with strong velcro to the crib, so I'm not sure if he'll be able to rip it off when he gets older, but for now, it's working for us.

Labels: ,

Thursday, January 10, 2008


A couple of random things:
-the fact that Rolo will soon have teeth and I will never again see his toothless, gummy smile saddens me.
-it has gone completely unnoticed by me that there is a writer's strike. Sure, I am aware that there is one, but it's not affected me in the least. This is because I mostly watch the news....and reality TV(hanging my head in shame).
-things occurring at my workplace are on my last nerve.
-I never use a dishwasher, even though I have one. Do you know that dishwashers break down if not used routinely?
-my husband has a conference in Vail, CO that's 7 days long and I'm trying to decide whether to go. I'd like to see Vail, even though I don't ski, but I'm not sure I want to leave Rolo that long to see Vail. To see Italy, sure, I'd leave him for a month.
-I'm still reading a book that I was reading 3 months ago. So it's taking me approximately 2 months and 28 days longer than normal to read this book. And it's not a hard book. And it's very interesting. I just suck at having free time.
-there's good friend of mine who I haven't spoken with in two years. I'm hearing through the grapevine that she's ill. I tried emailing her, but I haven't heard back. Not sure if that's because she's not speaking to me, or because she changed her email address. I'm trying to decide what to do next.
-my eye is not getting any better and Rolo's seems to be getting worse again.

Labels: , ,

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Higher Than I Can Count

That's a pretty big number.


Making My Blood Run Cold

Over here in the vortex of viruses, my pink eye is getting increasingly worse and I'm beginning to wonder whether I should call my doctor. Not only is it annoying as hell, but nothing can really make a girl feel more unpretty than something being wrong with her face. Like a bloodshot eye that's almost swollen shut.

So I got to thinking that I should cheer myself up with some shopping. I looked online at the usual suspects, namely Banana and Ann, to see if anything piqued my interest. And here's the scary part: nothing did. Oh, I saw some things I liked, but the thought of having to actually go and try things on...well, it seemed like too much effort. Perhaps some of you are thinking "I hear ya, sister!" but for me, this is very strange. I love trying on clothes. More, I love BUYING clothes. And yet I've had no desire to do so. Same thing with shoes. Now, I haven't been able to wear heels since Rolo was born. It's a long, sad story that I won't go into here, but next month I need to arrange to see a podiatrist, something I am totally dreading. Anyway, no desire to buy shoes either, not even fun ballet flats. I've been basically been living in my Sketchers. I'm all about a comfortable shoe, but c'mon, all the time with the Sketchers?

What is happening here, exactly? At first I thought, maybe I'm I just don't want to shop because I've gained a few pounds. But the more I think about, the more I don't think that's it. I'm just not interested. It's like I've forgotten the joy that is shopping.

And then I had a startling realization: maybe this is how it starts. I've always railed on women who go out and get generic haircuts, start buying all their clothes at Walmart and drive mini-vans (shudder). But maybe they used to care. Maybe they used to be fashionable. Maybe they used to live their own lives. Maybe this, this not caring about shopping, maybe this is how it starts. Maybe by this time next year my hair will be frosted and I'll be wearing white knock-off Keds. People, that thought made my blood run cold. I haven't stopped shaking since.

Please tell me there is hope here. Please tell me that by having a child I did not commit myself to a lifetime of bad cars and polyester pants.


Tuesday, January 08, 2008


I knew as soon as I saw this, it would be a huge story. Which is dumb and it annoyed me because I felt like of course the media will be all over this because she's a woman and she started to cry. Which, you know, is so TYPICAL of us women, emotional train wrecks that we are.

I happen not to like Hillary very much. But for a second, her words resonated with me. I don't know that she was faking it, but it was the eve of a primary she's not likely to win.


Dream Home

Ron and I very much enjoy the Florida Keys and I would like to live here, please.


Monday, January 07, 2008

Weighing In

Last week I went to the doctor's for a routine visit and learned that I'm only 11 pounds heavier than what I consider to be my normal weight. I'm 17 pounds heavier than I was at my wedding, but eh, who's counting? I'm pretty pleased that I basically only have to lose about 10 pounds. I thought the problem was worse, but 10 pounds seems doable. I have to factor in that my metabolism may slow down when I stop breastfeeding next month, but it's still doable. It's entirely possible that once I stop breastfeeding, I'll lose 5 pounds in my boobs alone (here's hoping!).

The fact that many of my pants don't fit me though doesn't really line up with the amount of weight I have to lose. I've been heavier than this and still had my pants fit. Which leads me to believe that things have definitely "shifted" since I had Rolo. My problem may not be so much about losing weight as it is about toning up. I plan on reviving my quest to find a neighborhood gym in the next week or two. Even if I can only go once or twice a week, I would really love to get back in the game next month.

Labels: ,

Sunday, January 06, 2008

The Road to Recovery

So over here, we've been dealing with a double ear infection, pink eye and a virus on top of it all. Needless to say, I believe the phrase "NOT FUN" is a bit of an understatement. The first antibotic Rolo was on didn't work, so mighty and powerful are these ear infections, but so far this new "big guns" medicine (as my pediatrican calls it) seem to be making a difference. Thanks be Jesus.

Anyway, in his infinite generosity, Rolo gave me his pink eye too, and let me tell you, do I ever look pretty. I can't say I even really care, as long as he's starting to feel better. I can handle me being uncomfortable. But poor Rolo, of course, doesn't know not to scratch at his eyes. And the larger issues were the ear infections, which left him wailing in pain, and the congestion which made it almost impossible for him to eat (hard to drink a bottle when you can't breathe through your nose). He's still not eating well, but there's no more fevers, and he's not pulling at his ear anymore. And every once in awhile, I get a smile from him, which I haven't been able to do the last couple of days, so I take all this as a sign he's getting better.

Of course, caring for a sick infant when you work full-time is interesting. I couldn't take him to day care of course. And I was reluctant to stay home and use sick days for consecutive days, as I'm assuming the winter is young and there will be more illness to come. Hence, I played this insane game of partially working from home, sometimes having my mother-in-law watch Rolo, and bringing Rolo to work with me. It wasn't exactly ideal, but at least I have some options. I know not all women do.

What I do know is that once this pink eye clears up and I am again suitable for public viewing, I really need a drink.

Labels: ,

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

One of Those Days

So far today the following has happened:
-I've called Rolo's doctor's office and spoke to a bitchy nurse about what appears to be pink eye.
-Realized I couldn't send Rolo to daycare, and also couldn't stay home from work because I'm incredibly short-staffed today.
-Had Rolo urinate all over me while taking his temperature.
-Headed to work with Rolo in tow.
-Realized that was a dumb idea.
-Went to pick up Rolo's eye ointment from the pharmacy, stopped off at home and seriously pissed him off by smearing the stuff all over his eye.
-Tried to head back to the office, but Rolo crapped everywhere.
-Realized I had no wipes in his room.
-Realized he tried to wipe his ass with his hand. Really needed those wipes.
-Screamed a little bit. Me, not him.
-Headed back to the office and realized Rolo had not napped all day. Tried to reconcile monetary transactions while rocking him.

And that's it so far. 2008 is GREAT so far.


Tuesday, January 01, 2008

Month Five

Today is not only the first day of 2008, it's also the day Rolo turns five months old. Five months, which is just one month less than six months, which is half a year. Holy cow.

The past month was a pretty big one for little Rolo. He got another round of immunizations. He started sleeping in his crib. And we started him on "solid" foods. So far, just rice cereal and sweet potatoes, but later this week, we're going to try carrots and then peas. Suddenly, feeding Rolo takes three times as long and is three times as messy. He likes his new high chair, but looks super-tiny in it. And super-tiny, he is not. He's 15 and a half pounds and 26 inches long. His cousin, who was born just two weeks before him is 13 and a half pounds and 23 and a half inches long. She's a litte peanut though.

We busted out Rolo's activity saucer this month--he's still a little too small for it technically (the baby's feet are supposed to be able to rest flatly on the bottom according to the instructions and Rolo's tippy toes just touch) and he loves it. He can actually interact with the toys on it and has figured out how several of them work. For Christmas, he got a "sing-along" stage, a LeapFrog musical table and a Kicking Gym. They are all large large items and have totally taken over my living room. I have to be honest, that does not please me in the slightest. However, I do appreciate people's generosity and frankly, Rolo has loved playing with all of them so far. It is fun watching him figure out how things work and how to play with things and for those reasons, I'm tolerating this hostile takeover of my living room.

Rolo still does not enjoy being on his stomach, which is kind of funny because he's very, very close to rolling over while on his back. He's going to be pissed when he does, only to find himself in the position he hates. This has also been the month of sickness. Rolo has now had a hacking cough, various fevers and a snotty nose for the entire month of Decemeber. The drawbacks to daycare.

In a little while we're going to bundle Rolo up and take him down to his first Mummer's Parade for a little bit before heading to Ron's parents' house for a roast pork dinner. Apparently, roast pork on New Year's Day is good luck. Happy New Year!


Free Blog Counter