Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The Losing Battle

I went back on the pill last week in an effort to get the bleeding/discharge/Lord-only-knows-what-else under control. I had asked the ob/gyn whether it was okay to take it while nursing and she assured me it was. She said the baby only gets a very small amount of the meds I take (which I knew) and that once my milk supply was well-established, which it was, it would not effect my production. And you know what? It worked like a charm. This week I am pad-free for the first time in three months. The freedom is intoxicating.

Know what else? My milk supply decreased by half. Turns out the ob/gyn didn't know what the hell she was talking about. Now, with Rolo starting day care next week, I'm not producing enough to get him through the day.

So my choices are: 1. stop the pill to increase my production, but that will almost certainly result in bleeding because I'll be stopping mid-cyle or; 2. continue the pill, use the milk that I've frozen over the last few months to get by and supplement with formula when that runs out.

Why does my body hate me? I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. I'd really like to continue nursing at least for a couple more months until Rolo has been in day care for awhile. But on the other hand I'd also like to stop with the freaking bleeding already.

Another option is to remain on the pill for the next 10 days, until the end of the cycle and then stop taking it. The thought being that maybe just one month of being on the pill will be enough to jump start my body into a normal cycle on its own. I guess this is an okay option but there's no guarantee it will work and continuing to decrease my production for an extended period, even if it's only another 10 days makes me nervous. On the other hand, since I've already started pumping hormones into my body, I'd hate to screw with it even more by suddenly removing those hormones.

What to do? I definitely won't be staying on the pill long-term until I've decided to stop breastfeeding. So it's just a question of when to stop. I'll have to think that one over.

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