Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Crack for All You Non-Drug User Types

My parents had very definitive ideas when it came to food for their kids. Not to say, they were health-freaks. Oh no, we had our fair share of fast food. They did have very particular rules though. Drinking soda before noon, for example, means that you must be living in the ghetto. Milk was to be drank with just about every dinner--even the aforementioned fast food. Sometimes even with pizza. Yeah, shudder with me now.

But perhaps they were most strict about cereal. On rare occasions, maybe in the summer as a treat, we would have Frosted Flakes. Other than that, it was always either Total or maybe Rice Crispies. Now you can argue that Rice Crispies may not be the most nutritional cereal, but it's better than a lot of others. At any rate, what my parents were trying to avoid--an addiction to junk cereal--worked. To this day, the likes of Trix, Fruit Loops, and Coco Puffs have never passed my lips. Understandably, I was outraged when they tried giving Fruit Loops to Rolo at his old day care.

For years I've been eating Kashi Go Lean Crunch, but the last couple of months to spice up the morning routine, I've occasionally gotten Total's Cinnamon Crunch. I like my cereal to stay crunchy in milk, which sadly, most Total cereals do not. But Cinnamon Crunch does plus it still have 100% daily intake of just about every vitamin and nutrient known to man.

The other day I asked Ron to pick up some bananas and some Total Cinnamon Crunch while I was at yoga. Instead he brought home Cinnamon Toast Crunch because they "didn't have" the Total kind. Right. That's really just man-talk for "I'm a man and can't find anything even if I'm staring right at it".

So yesterday morning I bust open my box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, not really thinking there would be much of a difference, and HOLY GOD, is this crack in a box? It's so...sweet and sugary and....how about I have another bowl? This is what I've been depriving myself of all these years?

Once I had gotten my fix this morning, I noticed that the box says something about it being a great source of calcium and vitamin D. Now, I knew that Cinnamon Toast Crunch wasn't going to measure up to Total in terms of nutritional value, but I decide it can't be that bad right?

Yeah, it's great source of calcium and vitamin D if you freaking add milk (and presumably drink all the milk from the bowl) and even then it's only 25% of your daily intake! In fact, without milk, it has between 0% and 10% of your daily vitamins. Compare that to Total, which has that 100% of everything under the sun.

Oh you are bewitching, you Cinnamon Toast Crunch, with all your great, seductive flavor. But I'll be going back to my Total and Kashi when you're done.



At 12:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My parents were the same way. To this day I've never had Lucky Charms, Trix, or any cereal with marshmallows. I had Cinnamon Toast Crunch for the first time in college and holy mother of god, life changing! I ate it three times a day for about two weeks. Now I want some. Dammit.


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