Thirtysomething

Oh Pass the Midol

Can we talk about PMS? Since boobs and constipation and lactation are regular topics on blogs I read (thanks Dooce), I think I'll throw PMS into the mix. The thing with PMS is that, with the exception of some water retention and minor cramping, I never used to get it. Now? It's like a life altering event each month.

I don't have it bad by most standards. Only minor cramping. But the headaches? The fatigue? The mood swings? It's ridiculous. And it never used to happen. But over the last year or so, I've noticed that particularly the mood swings go into high gear. Ron and I spent a perfectly nice yesterday organizing and watching football. By last night I was ready to throw him out of the house. I couldn't tell you why, and fortunately, he was at work by then. It's hard to throw someone out of the house when they're not there to begin with.

Saturday night we went to Ikea and Target, where PMS kicked my decisiveness into high gear. We spend hours shopping. I had promised Ron we could see Friday Nights Lights. Ron had already read the book. I cried the last half hour of the movie, and then was angry with Ron--could he have told me they were going to lose??? I wouldn't have spent so much time getting my hopes up if I knew they were going to lose anyway!!! Who makes a movie about a team that loses? Honestly. (Actually, I can be non-hormonal just long enough to say it was a decent movie but the cinematography was wacked out. It made me dizzy. Also, there was alot of blood and breaking of bones and tearing of ligaments. Yuck.)

We left the theater and I said, "My children will never play football." Ron gave me a blank stare as though I was speaking another language. "I mean it. They would never play football. Ever."

Tonight I'm going home and making chocolate chip cookies. Because chocolate chip cookies are the remedy for PMS.

posted by DJ Heavy D @ 7:19 AM